If you’re a smoker, trying to make the decision to quit smoking is probably something that you’ve thought about many times. There have probably been many times and many reasons that you have told yourself that you’re quitting. Or, you’ve tried to just lay them down or cut back, only to end up smoking more cigarettes once you gave up?
That was me up until a couple of years ago. I had smoked for 30+ years, was at least a pack a day smoker, and at times would be up to a pack and a half. I could also always tell when I had smoked too much, the headaches, the heavy chest, and the feeling of exhaustion. I would just feel like crap. There would always be the excuses too, having a bad day at work, stress at home, busy on a project, or whatever. But that’s what they were, just excuses. Smoking didn’t make anything better.
I decided (I thought) it was time to quit smoking and as always, thought this time would be different. This time I’m going to quit! But it took me two more times of trying and one last real decision to make it happen and finally quit smoking.
The first time I failed was because of how I tried to quit. I had heard that some people were having good luck with a drug called Chantix. I did some research on how it works and then went to see my doctor. He agreed that it was having good results, we talked about the possible side effects and I left with a prescription.
I have to admit, I was impressed. I’m sure everyone’s experience is different, but for me, after only three weeks of taking it, the cravings were gone. They were just gone! And that’s even though for the first week you can continue to smoke while the drug has a chance to build up in your system. I thought I had it beat. I was wrong.
Chantix is normally a twelve-week prescription which is purchased four weeks at a time. And since I wasn’t having any cravings for a cigarette, I didn’t see any reason to spend the money to continue taking it when I thought I had it beat. So, I stopped.
What I thought was my accomplishment of quitting smoking turned out to be that the Chantix was actually doing what is was meant to do. As the drug left my system the cravings came back. It didn’t take long and I was back to smoking like normal, or more.
I’m not sure how long it was after I had tried and failed the first time and I decided to try it again.
Feeling that I knew what I had done wrong the first time, I decided I would continue to take the Chantix for the full four months. I wanted to make sure I gave it fair chance. What did I have to lose? I’m either wasting money on cigarettes or spending it on something to help me quit.
And again, after the first few weeks my cravings for a cigarette were gone.
This time though, I managed to make it without smoking for about seven months, so about three months after I stopped taking the Chantix. One of the things that has always stuck with me about that period is that it was during that time that I took my two youngest sons white water rafting. It’s about a five-hour drive and I remember that I was happy knowing I could not only make the trip but also be on the river all day with them without the worry of needing a cigarette. It was a great feeling.
For some, you might think that if you could just make it for seven months without a cigarette, you would have it beat, that there would be no reason to start again. Unfortunately, an addiction doesn’t work that way. The cravings do come back from time to time. They have become fewer and weaker over time though.
After seven months, I’m not sure why I allowed myself to start smoking again. Maybe I rationalized that I could smoke just one when the cravings returned. If you’ve ever tried to quit you know exactly what I mean. That point where you say “if I can just have one cigarette”. The problem with “just one” when you are talking about an addiction of any kind is that one is never enough.
Maybe once the Chantix was gone from my system it allowed my cravings to return and I wasn’t prepared for that. Maybe I never truly made the decision to quit smoking and was just looking for an easy out.